Dealing with "Aah! Aah! Owiee!”

As I entered the Emergency department of our hospital the rest of the ‘guests’ looked at me intently. Many had been waiting for a long time to get their problems looked at. One man told me that he had been there three hours already waiting for someone to see his wife.

The Emergency Department of any hospital is always busy from what I have seen. People are in distress when they come and the number of them added to the amount of genuine need adds to the high feelings that you have in this place.

Generally there is pain everywhere. The parents that are holding the little boy across their laps are stroking his forehead as he cries. His little face is flushed. The older lady is leaning against her husband and trying to sleep. The middle aged lady is holding her left forearm with an ice pack on it. Each person sitting in front of the endless TV program stares endlessly. The most entertainment is looking at the others and trying to guess what is wrong without asking outright.

I have found that there are a few well meaning community members that practice medicine regularly without a license. I met one as I walked into the department for my own help. He looked at me and at my hand that I was holding. “So whaja do?” was his flat and direct question. The blood dripping from my left hand must have been a dead give-a-way. The bloody paper towel was bright and acted like a flag to draw all attention my way. With his question came all the other people’s stares. I was a star now and had everyone’s attention.

My answer was as straight forward as his question, “I am a woodcarver, and I decided to carve it accidentally.”

“What kinda tool?” was the next quick question.

“Foredom… a miniature table saw kind of tool.” I replied. “The blade was about a half inch across with dozens of little teeth for taking lots of wood out at the same time.”

“Hey, I got one like that too. Dangerous stuff for sure.” Then he looked down at my throbbing hand with the bloody paper towel squeezed around the wound. “Hurts doesn’t it?”

I looked up to see that one lady was slowly looking away from my hand to the TV. She had enough of the amateur diagnosis. Her quick assessment was settled, “this guy will get in before me…”

They call is “Fast Tracking” in emerge. Bloody paper towels help. Below the paper towel may well be a finger hanging by a thread and the need is there to reattach the throbbing member. I was sitting in the triage nurse’s presence in a heart beat – the paper towel helped I am sure. It helped that miraculously there was no one else standing at the red line on the floor where it states rather friendly like – “Do Not Cross This Line”

The kindly nurse asked, “So what happened? What did you do?” I offered the same explanation as I did to the curious guy out front. But she didn’t know what kind of power tool I was referring to. As she undid my paper towel compress I offered some further help – my wisdom and intuition for the night – “My daughter is going to kill me. She works for Dr. Van Brink, the guy that fixes a lot of us up, and he is away on holidays. So is she. And I am teaching her my grandson how to carve… I doubt she will let him grandpa teaching him anymore.”

Her quiet response was simple and straightforward, “I can see why.” I did some quick mind reading at this point and it seemed simple, her thought was, ‘Crazy old geezers and power tools don’t mix after dinner.’ I stared at my tattered finger and held my arm tightly as more blood seeped out.

I offered weakly, “I usually put crazy glue on the cuts and it works fine. But this one is a little too big. I think it needs stitches.” She nodded slightly and said, “They will look after you.” Another mind read took place as she let the thought pass quickly, “Crazy old geezer with crazy glue on his cuts, wait till coffee break… that is a good one!” – then she suppressed her giggle.

No kidding –within less than five minutes I was headed further into the ‘Fast Track’ with some other moaners. We sat in a small waiting room that only the bleeding and throbbing sit in. A little girl with a purplish hand looked up from her mother’s side. The little boy looked up from under his bandaged forehead. Everyone looked at the new puffy bandage on my left forefinger.

Now I don’t want to sound like I am complaining or anything – but some people are a real pain.

One lady was in the curtained cubby hole across from me. I could hear everything the doctor was asking her. I was now killing time until my turn to be seen by the doctor came along. The game is called, “Guess again what the pain is.”

I first tuned in as the doctor was apparently moving her right forearm. “Aah! Aah! Owiee!” was her reply to his question, “How about this movement?” Then “Aah! Aah! Owiee!” again… “Did you fall?” was his next question. “No…” was her weak reply… then “Aah! Aah! Owiee!”

The doctor’s next question was kind of funny, “The chart says you have ringing in your ears, dizzy, and faint at times. Tell me what that is about?” Then came, “That’s cold…“Aah! Aah! Owiee!” After an apparent lengthy examination of her ears his pronouncement came, “The wax is impacted over your ear drum and I cannot take it out. I won’t risk it here.” The conversation that followed was amusing and helped me pass the time as I waited for my turn. The “Aah! Aah! Owiee!” lady was almost done… and the doctor prescribed the solution… she needed to buy some oil and a small dropper to apply this to her ears each day and wait. He could do no more.

Imagine she was ‘Fast Tracked’ – good actress!

The little boy with the patch over his eye waited with his mommy in the next cubby hole. The little girl with the purplish arm was also sitting with her mom in the cubby hole on the other side.

My understanding for the medical staff that work the Fast Track area has grown to a higher level. These guys and gals are great. The took care of an “Aah! Aah! Owiee!” lady in no time. They helped a little guy with is forehead problem and wrapped up a purplish arm of the girl. And they even helped an old geezer that needed three stitches.

~ Pastor Murray Lincoln ~