"No way. They are all nuts."

“For God’s sake, would you shut up?” said the older, heavy set lady sitting in the padded arm chair. She had addressed the lady in blue beside her that had been talking loudly. “Your brain must be lonely in there with all that space. I know that you have had the inside of your skull polished by the best doctors in town. But I truly think they forgot to put all of your brain back inside when the task was done.”

The lady in blue said demurely, “Thank you so much for that compliment.”

The lady in the brown top across from her looked at her and said, “That wasn’t a compliment but a slur. She was being sarcastic again. Don’t you understand?”

“Oh I know.” said the lady in blue, “But it was one of the nicest things I have heard her say this week.”

It was at that moment that I snapped a photo of this group of seven sitting in the foyer, “The Town Center” of the senior’s retirement home where my wife’s aunt, Auntie Kaye, lives. (My intention was to have a few shots of the beautiful home for my family to see where she lives now.)

The heavy set woman looked at me sharply and asked, “What are you taking our picture for?”

The lady in blue chirped, “Oh I saw him taking pictures for the last while. He has taken lots of pictures, haven’t you?” Looking at me now – I was caught and drawn into “The Town Center” group of seven.

The lady in brown snapped at me, “You can’t take or use my photo or I will sue you!”

The lady in blue giggled and said, “He can so use your photo and you can’t sue him. You didn’t tell him before taking your picture that he shouldn’t take it. So you can’t sue him.” Then she giggled again. The lady in brown glared at the lady in blue’s apparent, surprising, new wisdom.

This is a real world for this gracious “Belles” of Oakville. They likely all were very important ladies of their days. Now they sit and discuss whatever, continually enjoying each other’s sparring and jousting of words. With an age range of 82 through to 93 they are a well aged school girl clique that likely would have been sitting at a cafeteria table at their high school – many, many years ago. They haven’t lost it but rather recreated it all over again.

Alida’s Auntie Kaye pays a little over $36,000 per year to live here. She can afford it easily. Having moved from a condo on the 14 th floor of a building, that stands on the edge of Lake Ontario at Bronte Creek, she can afford it. I think her condo sold for around $1 Million. No not the building – the two bedroom condo. It was nice – real nice.

When I asked Auntie Kaye if she does much with the group of seven – her flat reply was, “No way – they are all nuts. You know they are all crazy! I wouldn’t have anything to do with them!”

Now I know that Auntie Kaye was one of the true Belles of Oakville and region. Daily she had played at one of the best golf courses in Canada and one of the oldest. It didn’t allow just anyone into this Golf Club. It was for the elite. And none of this group of seven belonged to the Club. They might be able to afford the $30,000 a year room rent – but they were not her kind of people! Not at all – they were all nuts.

Turning to the left a little and there sets Joe. I know his name is Joe because a staff member called him that. He pulled the newspaper down a little and looked at her quizzically. My guess is he was once a banker or an investor. He was searching the investment/business sections of the national newspaper. He smiled and continued to read as the staffer walked on.

I also confirmed that his name was Joe – in that my mother went to sit in one of the fancy arm chairs as we sat to visit with Auntie Kaye. My mom wouldn’t sit down and she looked kind of funny. She looked over to me for help and pointed at her chair. I thought that someone had left some food in the chair – making a mess to sit in (or something else). Well it was something else alright. There to the side of the chair was a full upper denture plate. It kind of smiled at us as I took hold and retrieved the set of teeth so mom could sit down. There written on the side of the gums was “Joe Mac”.

I took the set of teeth to the desk and gave them to the receptionist, who then flatly stated, “I don’t want those things, they are not mine and I don’t know whose they are!” She wouldn’t touch them either.

Later Joe was reunited with his teeth – just before dinner time. When the staffer gave them back to him, he said, “Thanks, I knew where they were. They are a little uncomfortable so I take them out.” Translation to what he said, “I knew I laid them down in that chair, and I didn’t mind if that new lady sat on them before I used them again. I only needed them for dinner – not to read the newspaper. Thank you very much.” A true banker/investor mindset…

We chuckled all the way home in the van. It had been a wonderful day filled with reunions and laughter – mixed with odd creatures that were somewhat young at heart.

Just before I went to bed last night I giggled again at the comments by the group of seven. Then I thought of Joe. Then I thought of me…. fast forwarding about 20 more years.

The giggle started again. I can’t wait for my turn in a similar foyer. I think I will place my upper dentures on a chair too… then wait for some old girl to sit there. Then after she sits down, I will walk over and say, “Excuse me, I think you are sitting on my teeth.” Then with glee I will watch her jump straight up(slowly jumping that is…) – to which I will politely say, “Thank you.”

I giggled again. Joe is not so out of it after all. But Auntie Kaye still thinks that are all nuts.

Conclusion – aging is fun. Try it – you will love it.

~ Pastor Murray Lincoln ~